Empathy Makes a Difference
Empathy: the ability to understand and share the feelings of another, like putting ourselves into the mental shoes of someone to understand and even share their emotions and feelings.
Not until I saw it, did I believe it. I’ve been telling the tales of my recent visit and stay in Tulsa with my bro and sis-in-law and 99+ years-old mother-in-law. Though Karen and I stay in consistent contact as best friends and sisters, communication has amped up because Mom’s health and well-being has rapidly declined.
Not until I received the cry for help from Karen a couple of weeks ago and then go, could I fully understand what her 24/7 caregiving looked like. Suddenly, I was in the “know”! Once witnessing the arduous, daily routines plus mom’s mental and physical state, could I fully EMPATHIZE. It took authentic and real time commitment to understand and share the feelings and emotions of my sister.
In some measure, I could empathize because I cared for my mother and my husband and knew the toll it takes on our physical and mental well-being. During those times I didn’t need someone to say “Bless your heart. I know how you feel — I’ve been there.” I needed someone to roll up their sleeves and empathize with me and say: “I’m here for you anytime. Just call out my name and I’ll come running!” And, Karen was that for me in the care of her brother, and my husband.
St. Paul said in 2 Corinthians 1:4 “That you may be comforted with the same comfort that I’ve been comforted with by our God of comfort.” I know that comfort because I was comforted by God and others who empathized with me.
And that’s the comfort I brought Karen. We had many times of prayer and reading scriptures while I was there. Mom was in such peace during those times. We would sing old gospel songs. Mom would sing along. One time, we were singing “Oh come and go with me, to my Father’s house; to my Father’s house; to my Father’s house. Come and go with me to my Father’s house, where there’s peace, sweet peace.” Mom sang along and I sensed she was inviting Karen and I to come along with her because it won’t be long and she’ll be going to her Father’s house.
And, a merry-heart-does-good-like-a-medicine moment came, when after we sang “Come and go with me to my Father’s House”, Mom broke into “For he’s a jolly good fellow; he’s a jolly good fellow…..and Jesus is His name!”
Empathizing – understanding the feelings of others is one thing – but, doing something about those feelings is another. Lifting that one up to a higher level than staying put in the everyday ups and downs. That can best come when we go boldly to God’s throne of grace, where His mercy and grace are free-flowing in our times of need. The Lord is able to give peace to our troubled souls when we hear Him say: “Let not your heart be troubled.” Our sweetest comforts are in Him. He speaks peace to us. He gives hope and joy during our times of greatest need…..so much so that not only are we comforted — we have enough comfort left over to encourage and comfort others.
God is always with us. We are never alone. Reminding others of Him is what I call true empathy — true understanding of how it feels, but true love that gives them cause to live another day with hope and great expectation for this day and tomorrow. Who do you know that you could “empathize” with them and give them God’s peace and comfort today?