Peace Even When Anxiety Comes in Like a Flood
I love the words of St. Francis’ Prayer that goes “Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace”. That is sincerely my prayer — to be a peacemaker AND to live in that peace.
But, HELLO, anxiety! After two beautiful days in Tulsa, the finale was to be another first-weekend-of-November Sister Marie Pierre Retreat at Helmerich & Payne’s Cherokee Lodge in Hulbert, OK. It was on our calendars for more than a year. First, was the spring mini-retreat with Sister back in April. We thought maybe that might be the end, but Sister, at her almost 91 years, fragile, but with a no-quit spirit, reserved the lodge for us and game-plan was on. It was my joy to be her escort! I was bearing a huge responsibility seeing after this precious saint!
So, it’s 4:30 am on Saturday. I’m awake to pack up for heading to Austin after the retreat, get my blog posted, and pick up Sister by 7 am. I am in the moment. I get my phone to listen to my Bible readings as I get ready and….OH NO! My phone didn’t charge during the night. It is as dead as a doornail. I try the cord in another outlet. Nada. My mind begins to race. An Apple Store won’t open until 10 am in Tulsa and the retreat is in Hulbert OK – an hour away. My dilemma intensifies when I remember that I’m driving straight to Austin after the retreat ends at 3:30 pm. An 8-hour drive, as a single gal, in a car with over 130K miles on it, at night. My friends wake up because of the my debacle outside their bedroom door and proceed to help me resolve my conundrum. Then I remember I have a second charging cord in the car. I try it and whoa la! It starts to charge my phone. Now, I can be at peace, but I’m way behind schedule now in getting to Sister. As I hasten down the hall carrying my Yeti metal mug filled with ice and water, I slip on the floor runner and begin to fall forward but catching myself three times – not falling, but dropping the mug that opens and splashes water everywhere, including the gorgeous drapes. My friend quickly gets her hair dryer to dry the drapes while I’m using my towel to get up the water. Lord, have mercy! Anxiety overload!
I am finally out the door to pick up Sister and I’m fifteen minutes behind schedule. But, when I call her, it seems she, too, is having the same kind-of-morning. She says “If anything could go wrong, it has.” We’re finally on our way by 7:45 am We both survive this morning and it is by no means a surprise when Father Jack Gleason, the pastor we all loved for so many years, is speaking to us about the “Antidote to Anxiety” found in Luke 12:22-31. Imagine that!
“Jesus said to His disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not worry….notice the ravens: they do not sow or reap….yet God feeds them. How much more important to you than birds? If even the smallest things are beyond your control, why are you anxious about the rest? Notice how the flowers grow. They do not toil or spin. If God clothes the grass….” Father Jack explains that Jesus is trying to get us to look outward instead of inward. His antidote is found in creation. Birds – flowers – grass. All trusting in the providence of God. I receive his message loud and clear. Sister and I survive our early morning fiascoes because God is looking out for us – even in the midst of the anxiety that we both know came from the enemy of our souls to keep us in a frenzy about a day that would turn out to be glorious and spectacular in every way.
Sister Pierre follows later in the day with her own message of peace, resting in who God made us to be – beings, instead of doings. “God cannot not love you. He is always shining on you even when you feel like you’ve blown it. Rest in his peace and let anxiety go. Settle down.” Paul said in Philippians 4:6-8 “Do not be anxious about ANY-THING, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
St. Paul lived by example for you and me. He showed us how to trust God in all things….even in a prison cell or cell phone mishap or a slip and fall. He said “Do NOT be ANXIOUS about any-THING!” When we have the mindset “It’s nothing but a thing,” we take on a heavenly perspective and eliminate needless anxiety and can settle in to our confidence in God’s words in Romans 8:28 – “ALL THINGS work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purposes.”