The Perfect Dates
Our family from Canada headed back north yesterday. While here, they took in the sun, had great family time, enjoyed shopping sprees, and prepared for the snow that remains and is hopefully starting to melt as the temperatures rise in Winnipeg. And, I, headed northeast to Rusk to help my daughter move into their new home. After lots of setbacks, oh what joy to see them being able to move from their RV to their home with a view!
We’re making shopping trips to town for all the necessary items to equip the new place. This has been an ongoing routine for us for each of their moves. I love helping my girl get all settled so she can carry on with her busy life of helping so many other people.
I thought about one of our previous shopping sprees and pulled up this photo. We called it our “Perfect Dates”. We posed for this photo and we meant it to be funny and it was. But then, I started giving it more thought. Here are two women with two men who don’t see us or speak to us. What boring dates! Others might say: “The Perfect Dates”! We didn’t need to dress up or put on make-up, and we could talk and talk without interruption!
I know there are many women AND men out there who live in that existence. Women feel like their husbands could care less about them, how they look and what they say. Those men stay glued to their computer or TV, with little thought for giving their wives or children attention. It’s also the case for many men who feel that their wife gives more attention, concern and care to their children and others than to them.
It’s easy to look back on my past and see all the things I could have done better. My life has been blessed, but it took the death of my sweet husband to realize just how blessed my life really was. That’s why I sense such responsibility to pass along wisdom I’ve gained to tell all you husbands and wives to treasure the lives you have together. Treasure them by investing into them.
How many times do you argue with your spouse over the silliest things? The toothpaste lid, who makes dinner, the toilet seat being left up, telling each other how to drive? Trust me when I say, it’s not worth it. It’s a waste of time to spend time over pointless drama when you can be laughing and smiling at all the joy that surrounds you. Cultivate your relationship by deliberately setting aside time for quality communication, sweet moments of telling each other just how valuable they are to you and the family, and to really listen to each other. Protect your marriage by investing in it with intentional, deliberate times together.
For all the things I regret not knowing or doing before my husband’s death, what I don’t regret is my decision to live a full and passionate life after his death. I’ve promised myself I won’t miss an adventure and I will laugh and live life with all the joy and happiness I can find. We can’t go back and change the past, but we can all change our present, our future AND the memories we will have with our loved ones. That’s what I’m doing here in Rusk – to help make a difference. We can learn from our mistakes and we can make sure we LOVE LARGE and we can make sure we live each day in the richest way we can — in the moments!