Journaling my Weaknesses

I read from my journal that this time last year, my now husband, but then good friend and I were on a 9-day hiatus from each other. That was to see if we were really a “thing” and if so, we needed some time to seek God about our relationship to be sure of His favor.

Now, a year later, I often read some of my musings about him from my journal and what I said about us each day. We laugh about those nine days because my journal indicates that we weren’t doing a very good job at not communicating with each other. We thought “Surely God wouldn’t mind if we adhered to not seeing each other or talk over the phone, but an occasional text message would be okay!”

We couldn’t help ourselves. We missed each other’s company. We laugh about it now that we are a big four months into our marriage and reading about how we were acting like teenagers back then.

I have been journaling for years and often I’ll refer back to one of my journals to remember what was going on in my life back then. There are times when I am doing my devotions that I journal. I have become more adept at interpreting God’s leading and plan for me as I further experience life and receive what He has done.

By looking back on what we have been through and seeing the hand of God there, we can have greater encouragement for what we are going through now or even what lies ahead. As I gain new insight of the Lord’s working into my issues and challenges, I realize how small they really are compared to my Lord’s holiness and greatness.

Concentrating on Christ and what He has done in our lives will lift us up better and more completely than anything else we could ever do. It has taught me to look beyond myself and concentrate on Christ.

Best. Journal. Ever. That is God’s Word. We look at God’s Word as a mirror to ourselves, into our souls, not to see us, but to see God working in us. I often read a scripture that opens my eyes to my weaknesses. Then I read another scripture that God uses our weaknesses like this one written by the Apostle Paul:

“But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

When I read my last year’s ponderings in my journal, I see the real me when I am weak and concerned about something or someone. But then I hop right back over to the truth of God’s Word and His interests and not my own.

My daily devotional readings, my journal and God’s Word are tools to mature my faith. It is in those places that Christ becomes even more real to me, and my worries and anxieties become less. “He must become greater; I must become less.” (John 3:30)

The strength that God provides in our weaknesses is much greater than any strength that we could muster on our own. So, we should not try and hide or avoid our weaknesses, but rather, embrace them, allowing God to strengthen us in ways we could never have imagined.