The Symbols and Mementos of a Beautiful Life
My Sweetheart went “home” on November 16, 2010. On the day after, it was already time to begin the preparations for his home going celebration. We had to do all those necessary things one must do in dealing with a loved one’s passing: go to the funeral home, choose a casket and determine burial logistics, go to a florist and pick out flowers from the family, and visit with the pastor about the funeral specifics. And, we did all those necessary things to celebrate my Sweetheart’s life and home going. God guided every one of our steps.
Symbolism plays a vital role in our worship to God — no matter our religious affiliation — our hand gestures, religious icons, candles, pictures, music, scriptures, and so many other various forms of remembrance. And, likewise, I would find so much symbolism in the decisions surrounding the preparations that followed. Everything we decided on symbolized this precious man we loved and adored.
So, yesterday, the 7th anniversary of his home going, we knew it was part of God’s master plan for Mom, Karen and I, to go through Mom’s things that we’re deciding on “keeping or letting go” before her move to Karen’s. Like my Sweetheart went through a transition time to heaven, no doubt Mom is going through transition time. It’s no longer sensible for her to live on her own, so we’re helping her “let go” of so many treasures and so many memories that she and Dad had for over 53 years together. Transition isn’t a “piece of cake”. It’s coming to grips with the “past is the past” and it’s time to move on. Mom is doing her best to move on, but we’ve learned, oftentimes the hard way, that pushing her isn’t the thing to do. I understand that. Her “normal” is changing and giving her the freedom she needs to stay in some form of control, we’ve learned, is best.
Yesterday, it was Mom and I going through her nightstands that contained so much memorabilia AND symbols that opened the door for many stories of where and who “that” came from. It was reading notes and then having to make the tough decision to keep or let go. It took over an hour to go through one drawer. We had so many priceless moments together. I surprised myself because I’m a typical “get-er’-done and be done, kind of gal” – but that is not the case with a 95-year old who isn’t thinking about time and “doing”. It was definitely time and “being”. On this day (the anniversary of Ron’s promotion to heaven), God’s timing was perfect for us to be captured with precious memories that symbolized my Sweetheart’s and Mom’s son’s life.
We would find so many mementos that were symbolic of this beautiful man on this day. Mom pulled out a book and inside was this bookmark where Mom had written “Ron’s Silence” 11/16/10 – yesterday’s date of Ron’s passing. Obviously, God directed her to this book to be read on this day which talked about “stilling our bodies and minds in order for God’s Spirit to communicate with our spirit.” These words assured her that Ron’s inner and outer quiet during the many days of his illness, was him in a holy place of “the secret place of the most high”. We ran across the train of Karen’s bridesmaid dress that she wore in our wedding, 51 years ago. Mom ran across many hand-written cards and notes from Ron to her. We opened a clothes bag and there was Mom’s “Run for Ron” t-shirt that we wore in our “Movement of Gratitude”. All of those sweet items were remembrances – symbols – precious times of love, laughter, family, sacred holy times, full-of-life times.
Thank you, Father God, for your “hugs” from heaven on a day of celebrating your beloved son, Ronald Jonathan David Wuerch. Thank you for choosing me to be the love of his life and for me to be welcomed into that love – not only from him, but his entire family. Thank you for Mom who has been Mom to me from the start. Thank you for the journey of faith that began as children and carried us through the thick and thin times — to that place of destiny and purpose until You call us home. Thanks for the memories!